Random poem

I wrote this in thinking that  life can humble you with circumstance. One of the lowest of the lows is the theme here: Loss of love. This was not fun to write. I don’t know why it came out of me.

The Mask of Dignity

I sit at the back, and hide behind my hat.

Although I strode in erect and graceful,

My courage has flown out of my chest,

In gusts of expelled breath, in several mouthfuls.

My brother said, “You should object,” in jest,

And quickly rescinded: I shouldn’t lose my nerve.

I should go and finish my quest,

And get the whole thing out of my chest.

So the dress was made and the hatter paid,

I insisted that I must remain in the shade.

My garments were tight.

She must have done that for spite,

For maybe if I could run, none could dissuade my flight.

The holy pillars are past and I have passed.

Excellently disguised, none would have guessed.

I tried my best.

I stole the view of flowers and silk everywhere,

A touch of satin and brocade here and there,

All were sharing in the collective outpouring of good spirits and constructive energy.

I was so sad, sad as could be,

But my face would remain smooth and never disrupt the ambiance of glee.

Then he came.

I almost collapsed.

The little breath I could draw in this infernal dress was gone,

And I needed it desperately.

Dressed impeccably:

He always did for these things,

He made his way to the front.

He spoiled his repertoire with not an emotion to temper his features.

“He wishes to be fed quickly and put his wife to bed,” snickered the gentleman at my side.

I heard him grunt sharply not a second after.

Why could I not find the humour in it?

“What a beautiful ceremony!” the gentleman said later.

I felt like a star fell on me from the skies and I was still standing in the crater.

I was crushed, burned, shattered to pieces,

Nothing left: I had played all my aces.

I wanted to hate her,

But I knew this was the best thing.

Time to forget this scruple.

I went into the deep and acknowledged the couple.

I bowed solemnly and turned swiftly on my heel.

I was suddenly disoriented but at will, turn to steel.

“Wait!” he exclaims.

He almost rises but his wife stays him with a hand like a vice.

I turn and face them.

He severs himself from her and saunters down to me.

I almost faint from his strong embrace,

He holds my body and looks through the shade into my face.

“Thank you for being here,” he says, not letting go of me.

The kiss he puts on my cheek scandalises everyone,

So I remove my hat.

All bow slightly in understanding.

I leave quickly, leaving him shouting behind me.

I know the driver awaits but I can’t let him see me.

I walk slowly in the direction of my home, bathed in sun, my hat still at the church.

When the doves were finally released, I allowed the tears to flow.

By Louella Mahabir

24th. July, 2012

 

 

Was it fun to read?

Advertisements

~ by louella001 on July 24, 2012.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
%d bloggers like this: